GUEST WRITER: Mitchell's Nasty Hat Address

Mitchell's Enormous Pupil
Originally uploaded by visionerry.

thank you 'dad' and 'mandy' for being people of integrity. thank you for displaying grace and class.

my hat, purchased for 3.99 at a gap outlet, has visited three continents, seen three oceans, and trekked across two vast deserts. it was there when bush was elected, and when he was elected again; when shaq put on the miami black; and when ashley simpson got booed off stage the first, second and fifth times. it was there for phil's first major victory, for the first time i pumped a tank at $3/gal., and even for the modest, though impressive, revival of pauley shore's career. it, in short, has an identity forged by experiences both great and small. and i don't need anyone's approval to love it in all its glory, and, to quote john, its 'nast'.

i wish you all the best, and assure you that when my mom sees the thing she'll toss it in the wash.